


Knights of the Broom Order

by Sergeant_Sporks



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Wizards: Tales of Arcadia
Genre: Angst, Death, Do they count as an OC if you stole them from Arthurian legend?, Dragons, Fluff, Gen, Injury, Magic, OC's - Freeform, Trolls, Wizards
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:22:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27812236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sergeant_Sporks/pseuds/Sergeant_Sporks
Summary: Sir Gareth: knight of the round table, most notably known as "the Kitchen Knight," a knight who started out sweeping floors and scrubbing dishes.Needless to say, he and Douxie have a lot in common, including the need to prove themselves.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	1. Since When Have First Impressions Ever Gone Well?

Douxie ran a hand through his bangs, tears running down his face. This was his fault. He’d messed everything up again—somehow. And now Merlin was… He should have known—he should have figured out healing magic. If there was healing magic. He should prepared himself after last time.

Xxx

“Hello? Are you Merlin?”

Douxie straightened up from where he’d been picking up books Merlin had left lying around. A young knight who looked strangely familiar—probably just because he looked like all of the other knights, tall and blonde—was standing there, hand near the doorframe like he was not sure whether or not to knock. Merlin was god-only knew where—but more importantly, how had this knight mistaken _him_ for the old wizard?

Douxie went with the most natural answer. “Yes,” he responded, “I’m Merlin. Master wizard. That’s me.”

The young knight—seriously, they made them this young? He didn’t look any older than Douxie himself—grinned. “Oh! Great! You can do… magic, right?”

“Yep. All things magical, that’s me. You can tell it, I can spell it.” Hm. That catchphrase needed work.

“Master Merlin—”

“Douxie, what are you doing?”

Douxie winced as Merlin appeared in the doorframe behind the knight. Well, it had been fun while it had lasted. He could’ve gotten used to being called ‘Master Merlin.’ “Just cleaning up. Like you told me to.”

The knight’s head whipped back and forth. “I’m sorry—there’s got to be a mistake. He’s Merlin.”

One of Merlin’s grey eyebrows rose. “Oh, is he?”

Douxie gave him a sheepish grin. “Heheh…”

“I’m afraid you’re quite mistaken, young knight. I’m Merlin. That sorry excuse for a wizard is my apprentice, Hisirdoux. It’s a good thing I arrived before you asked him to do any magic, or you might have ended up missing a few limbs.”

The knight gave Douxie a horrified look. “Ah, he’s exaggerating,” Douxie protested, “I’m actually well on my way to becoming a master wizard, thank you very much, and—”

“Hisirdoux, go take care of your cat, he’s hacking up hairballs all over the place.”

“Oh, that’s natural, all cats do it, there’s nothing to worry abou—”

“Hisirdoux. Now.”

Oh. “Right. I’ll go take care of Arch.”

Douxie trudged towards his room, where Archie was not, in fact, hacking up hairballs, but was reading a book. “He’s not listening again.”

“Mm. What else is new?”

“I was _this close_ to getting some knight to believe that I was Merlin.”

“Which would have been good why, exactly?”

“It would have been nice to be recognized as a wizard instead of…”

“An errand boy?”

Douxie sighed, dropping down next to his friend. “Yeah. That. Wonder why Merlin wanted me to leave, though? Normally as long as I keep my mouth shut—”

“But you didn’t, did you?”

“Hm…” Douxie scrolled through the spells on his bracelet. “Spying spell, spying spell… I know I learned one, where is it?!”

“You think that’s a wise idea? Spying on him?”

“I just want to know what’s going on, is that a crime?”

“Well, magic certainly is.”

“There it is!” Douxie cast the spell, and Merlin’s voice echoed in the chamber as clearly as if the wizard were standing there.

“I don’t believe I can help you, Sir Gareth. Magic weapons are hard to come by, and some might consider it unwise to seek such a weapon with our king’s current disposition towards magic.”

“But there’s a _dragon_!” the young knight’s voice pleaded, “My normal sword can’t pierce it, not without more strength than I have, and Arthur’s too busy with his war against the trolls to fight it with Excalibur!”

“Then I suggest you leave well enough alone and not meddle with a _dragon_.”

“A _dragon_ ,” Douxie whispered. One of those hadn’t been seen for… he didn’t know how long. Since everyone had stopped attempting to slay Charlemagne. Well, except for Archie, but he didn’t really count.

There seemed to be a pause in Gareth and Merlin’s conversation. “Did you hear something?” Merlin said finally.

“Fuzzbuckets,” Douxie swore. What had he done wrong this time?!

“HISIRDOUX,” Merlin thundered, and Douxie could hear him with and without the spell, “YOU STOP YOUR SPYING RIGHT THIS INSTANCE!”

Douxie ended the spell. “What went wrong?!”

“Perhaps you used a communication spell instead of a spying one,” Archie suggested, “Are you _sure_ you said the incantation correctly?”

“Whatever the problem was, I’m guessing that we’re in trouble.”

“ _We_? I don’t recall asking you to spy on them.”

Douxie flopped on his bed. “Right. You think if we run away to the forest the trolls will protect us from him?”

“Now you’re just being dramatic.”

“I’m sure I could get used to the taste of socks if I tried.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. They’d be _horrible_ for your digestion tract.”

“I’m sure Bular the Butcher would be more merciful than Merlin will be. What do you think? Milking that… _thing_? Trying to feed the gnome? Or even better, cleaning out the dungeons!”

“Douxie, stop moping around,” Merlin ordered, sweeping into the room, “You’re going to be getting some magical plants from the Wild Woods.”

Archie nudged Douxie with his head. “You may just get that chance to meet Bular the Butcher.”

Douxie sprang to his feet. “But Master—”

“No buts or excuses. I need these plants.” Merlin handed him a list. “They may be an important part of the weapon.”

“ _May_ be? I’m risking my life for plants that might not even be useful?!”

“Don’t be so dramatic. They should be on the edges of the forest—you won’t meet anything more dangerous than a gnome. And I should hope you can handle one of _those_. If you’re good enough at magic to attempt an eavesdropping spell, you can defend yourself from a few gnomes.”

“Yes, Master,” Douxie grumbled, “C’mon, Arch.”

Archie followed him out the door. “Don’t worry. I can protect you from a few gnomes, if it comes to that.”

Douxie scanned the list as he crossed through the training courtyard. “Why do I think that it won’t be that simple? Sure, he _said_ they’d be on the edges, but what if we _do_ have to go deeper? Or worse, what if we run into a patrol?” He puffed his chest out, doing his best imitation of Merlin. “Hisirdoux, what have you done _now_? Running afoul of the king’s men, are we? Need I remind you that the king hates magic and would have killed you if I had not stepped in? You can’t just wander about the wild woods like you own the place!”

“If it goes wrong, it’ll be _your_ fault,” Archie agreed, “That seems to be the standard.”

“Hey!”

Douxie jumped. It was the young knight—Sir Gareth. “Oh. Hey.”

“Hisirdoux, right?”

Douxie held his hands up. “Right, sorry about spying on you like that. And telling you that I was Merlin.”

Sir Gareth laughed. “I was the one dumb enough to fall for it. Look, I could really use your help, Hisirdoux.”

“Ah—just Douxie is fine. Merlin’s really the only one who calls me Hisirdoux. Everyone else calls me Douxie. Or Merlin’s errand boy, whichever they think is shorter.”

Sir Gareth deflated a little at that. “Oh—you mean you’re not a wizard?”

“No! I am!” Douxie replied hastily, “I am a wizard—well, wizard apprentice, not a master wizard—yet—but yes. Yes I am.” Right, he was sounding more and more like an idiot, this was going well.

“Great! I’m looking for someone with a little magic expertise, and since Merlin rejected me flat-out—”

“This about that dragon?”

“Yes. It is.”

A thrill of panic shot through Douxie—was Gareth really suggesting that _he_ help with this? “Have you tried Morgana?”

“No, thanks. She’s a little too fond of all magical creatures for me to risk asking her to help me kill one. I like my head where it is, thanks.”

“Right—well, I can’t help you find a magic weapon, sorry. Merlin was right about that one—they’re not exactly easy to get, and I appear to be fresh out.”

Sir Gareth paused. “Oh. You really did stop listening when Merlin yelled at you.”

Douxie’s brow creased. “Yeah? Of course I did? I was already in trouble, no use making it worse.”

The knight shrugged. “I’d say that if you’re already in trouble, you might as well continue and get what you came for. Well, anyway, I asked Merlin if he’d be willing to come along and aid me with magic.”

“Let me guess;” Douxie readopted his Merlin impression. “heh. No.”

“Pretty much,” Sir Gareth agreed, “Anyway, I’d still like a bit of magic on my side. Would you come?”

Douxie stared at him like he’d grown two heads. “Let me get this straight; you came up to Merlin’s tower, were told that if you asked me to do magic, you’d get your limbs blown off, watched me royally botch a surveillance spell, and you want me to help you kill a _dragon_?”

Sir Gareth beamed. “That’s about it.” He gave Douxie a mischievous grin. “Besides, I wouldn’t say that you royally botched a surveillance spell, I’d say you managed a really good communication spell. Point is, I could use your magic.”

“How about a bit of magical advice, then?” Douxie suggested, “Don’t try to attack a dragon by yourself. It’s not just some Stalkling that breathes fire—they’re _smart_.

“Thank you,” Archie responded, stretching, “It’s nice to hear it said, sometimes.”

Sir Gareth jumped about a foot in the air. “Your cat _talks_?!”

“You… haven’t been around Camelot long, have you?”

Gareth stared at Archie. He'd _really_ be in for a shock if he ever saw Archie transform. “I haven’t ever had any reason to go up where Merlin lives!” He snapped his attention back to Douxie. “So… will you help me?”

“Can’t. I’ve got some very important plants to find. Safety of the realm and all that. Merlin will have my head if I go dragon-hunting.” Not to mention that he didn’t exactly feel confident about fighting one.

“You’re sure?”

“ _Very_.”

“I’m going. Whether there’s a wizard with me or not.”

Douxie waved as he kept walking towards the gate. “Have fun. Take some other knights with you.”

“They won’t. They think it’s suicide.”

“You should listen to them.” Douxie exited the city, heading straight towards the Wild Woods. Minutes later, a horse came thundering out after him, nearly running him over. Knight in full armor. Douxie dove to the side to avoid the horse. “Well, good luck to you, too,” he grumbled, picking himself up. He checked Merlin’s list. “Let’s see…” A rasping sound coming from a bush caught his attention. “Uh-oh.”

Archie transformed into a dragon, flapping close to the bush. “One,” Douxie mouthed, spinning through his spells to find something he could use, “two…” There, a containment bubble. “Three!”

Archie swiped the bush to the side, and Douxie cast the spell, trapping a _very_ startled knight.

“Oh, sorry!” Douxie dropped the spell, the knight dropping with an ‘oof.’ He was in bad shape—burns laced the side of his face, and his leg was bleeding heavily from claw marks. “What _happened_ to you?”

The knight gripped his wrist. “The dragon,” he rasped, “It’s impossible—I tried to fight it…”

Douxie glanced at Archie, helping the knight to his feet and letting him lean on him. “Hang on—you’ll be alright, let’s just get you back to Camelot. Find you a doctor. Get you all fixed up. Stick with me.”

He half-carried, half-dragged the knight to the gates. "Hey, this man needs help!”

The guards at the gate came rushing towards him, picking up the knight and carrying him away. “Will he be alright? Hey!” Douxie glanced back at the trail of blood they’d left behind. “Oh—that’s fantastic.” Gareth would be going after that dragon. By himself.

“We’re going after that idiot, aren’t we?” Archie sighed.

Douxie turned towards the stables. “Yes. Yes, we are.”


	2. Knights and Dragons

“So, how badly do you think Merlin will react when he finds out we’re chasing a dragon instead of getting those plants?”

Archie perched on the saddle, cleaning himself. “I’d say we’ll be lucky if he doesn’t throw us in the dungeons with the trolls.”

“You think Sir Gareth has gotten to the dragon yet? He galloped off pretty fast.”

“Nope, I’m right here.”

Douxie nearly fell off of his horse as Sir Gareth’s voice sounded behind him. The knight laughed.

“I circled back around when I heard someone coming. Decided to fight the dragon with me after all?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

Sir Gareth rode his horse in circles around Douxie. “You can just call me Gareth. So, what kind of spells can you do? Killer death bolts of lightning?”

Archie coughed in a way that sounded suspiciously like a laugh. Douxie shook his head. “I can make a broom float around and attack me.”

Gareth laughed. “Why would you do that? How about fire, can you do fire? Or better yet, fire protection?”

“I can do a shield, yes.”

“Great! Okay, here’s my plan; you keep it from killing us, and I’ll stab it.”

Archie licked his paw and cleaned his ear. “Simple. To the point. We’re going to get killed.”

Gareth deflated. “You think so?”

Douxie explained what had happened to the knight he’d found—no use sugar coating it. “Don’t get your hopes up,” he finished, “We’ll be lucky if we survive.”

“I’m not worried.”

One of Douxie’s eyebrows rose, making him feel peculiarly like Merlin. “Oh? Why not?”

“Because I have a wizard on my side,” Gareth replied cheerfully, riding forward.

“We’re going to die,” Archie said matter-of-factly when the knight was out of earshot.

“Yep. Pretty much.”

Xxx

“So, what’s being a wizard like? Exciting, I bet. Could you teach _me_ magic?”

Archie flapped in circles around Gareth’s head, maybe in revenge for the circles Gareth had ridden around their horse. “Unlikely. There _is_ a certain ‘born into it’ aspect of magic. If you haven’t shown any magic ability, it’s very improbable that Douxie could teach you.”

“Oh.” Gareth was only silenced for a moment. “What exactly does a wizard apprentice _do_?”

“Chores, mostly,” Douxie grumbled, “Merlin tends to confuse the words ‘apprentice’ and ‘servant’ with each other. I have to sweep up, clean after whatever experiments he’s doing, pick up all of the books he just leaves lying around… I thought being a wizard’s apprentice would be exciting, like you said. But it’s mostly housework. That’s just me, though. Morgana, now _she_ learns _magic_. Wish I could learn some of the real stuff, not just do servant work.”

Gareth stood up in his stirrups, twisting around to look back at Douxie. “Hey, don’t dismiss servant work. That’s how I became a knight.”

“Hm. You know, somehow I don’t find that very believable.”

Gareth let go of the reins of his horse, holding them up defensively. “Hey, it’s true. Whoa!” he grabbed the reins again before he lost balance, thumping back down into the saddle. He pulled back until he was riding right next to Douxie. “When I got to Camelot, I was… mmm… incognito, you could say. I wanted to be a knight on my own, not because of nepotism.”

Douxie rested his chin on his hand, his elbow on the saddle horn. “You know how knighthood works, right?”

Gareth waved a hand. “Yeah, yeah, I know, only noble-blooded people can be knights, unless you happen to be Lancelot. And I kept recommendation letters and whatnot, I just didn’t want to be given more chance than anyone else because of who my family was.”

“Who _is_ your family?”

“That’s beside the point, Douxie. The point was that I didn’t want special treatment. My family agreed to that, and I… I took the job the knights would give me. Which… happened to be the kitchen work.”

“Let me guess;” Douxie deepened his voice. “You have to learn discipline! The value of hard work! And the worth of the common man!”

“That’s about right,” Gareth agreed, “Anyway, so I did all of the dishes, peeled all of the potatoes, cleaned the floors, kept the fires going… you know, kitchen stuff. Never complained, because I signed up for it.”

“Well, that doesn’t sound like _you_ , Douxie,” Archie chuckled.

“Eventually, I got my chance. Damsel in distress, harrowing trials, the usual.” Gareth spread his hands, and his horse drifted off course. “Whoops!” he grabbed the reins again. “Anyway, I’m a full knight, I’m betrothed—”

Douxie choked. “ _Betrothed_?!”

“Yes. To the lovely Lady Lyonesse. Who I rescued. Her sister can be a real piece of work. Called me names the whole way of the rescue. But hey, Lynette was only ten at the time, so I hold nothing against her.”

“How long ago was that?”

“Ah, four years?”

“You’ve been betrothed for _four years_?”

“First you’re surprised I’m betrothed. Now you’re surprised I’ve been betrothed this long. Look, I was fifteen at the time we got betrothed. We’re leaving it until we’re older. I rescued her from her captors—it’s standard that you get betrothed to the lady you rescued. I see her and Lynette every weekend, and we’ll get married _someday_ , just not now.”

“But if you save several people…”

Gareth laughed. “I don’t get betrothed to them _all_. Normally it’s the first one, or the one closest to your age, or the prettiest one or whatever—it’s not a set thing, just a kind of tradition. Lyonesse is great. She’s nice, and funny, and smart, and she can’t cook to save her life, but that’s okay, because I know all about cooking since I worked in the kitchen. And Lynette… we were worried for a bit that she was going to possess magic, but—”

Douxie jerked his horse to a stop. “ _What_?”

Gareth rolled a hand. “Lyonesse and I tried to sneak off once, and Lynette… Well, I don’t know that it was her, but I’m pretty sure it was. But she hasn’t shown any magical tendencies since, thank God. But yeah, I’m betrothed, life’s great, servant work… isn’t… so bad…” Gareth trailed off as they entered a scorched, ruined area. “What happened here?”

Douxie touched a blackened tree, his fingers coming away black with soot. “Guess the dragon got mad.” He dismounted. “C’mon. I don’t want the horses to get killed.”

“Oh, but it’s fine if _we_ get killed?” Archie snarked, “Great plan.”

Gareth hopped down from his horse with an almighty _clank_ of armor. “Where is it?”

Douxie followed the trail of destroyed forest. “Archie… any reason that a dragon would do this?”

“How about a bunch of idiot knights keep attacking him?”

“That’s fair.” Douxie tripped over a fallen log. “Ugh, it’d be nice if he’d leave the scenery alone, though.”

“Uh, Douxie?” Gareth’s voice squeaked on the last syllable.

“What?” Douxie looked up from the ground as the log he’d tripped over shifted and moved. Not a log. A tail. “Fuzzbuckets.”

A pair of intelligent eyes stared at him, and the dragon started to growl. Douxie froze in place. Not good, not good, not good!

“You smell like the last knight who came here,” the dragon growled, “I’ll take care of you, too.”

“Die, dragon!” Gareth yelped, drawing his sword, “Leave the wizard alone!”

The dragon turned, every muscle coiled tight. One claw pinned Douxie to the ground. The pressure was light, but the claw was razor sharp. If the dragon pushed just a little harder, he’d be a grease spot. “Why don’t you put down that metal stick, or I’ll spear your little wizard friend?”

Gareth didn’t budge. “Why don’t you release my little wizard friend, or _I’ll_ spear _you_?!”

“I’m right here,” Douxie complained.

The dragon tapped its claw thoughtfully up and down on Douxie’s back, and he winced, expecting it to go through him every time. “Hmm… You know, I’m not sure you’re in a great position for negotiations, little knight.” It pressed its claw back down, and Douxie wheezed as the breath was pushed out of his lungs.

“If you hurt one hair on his head—”

Douxie scrolled through his spells, glancing up at the dragon, but it seemed to be completely focused on Gareth.

“It doesn’t have to come to that, knight. Just put down your sword, and I’ll let the two of you off with a light scorching. You can’t be more than hatchlings—I’m willing to let you live.”

“You’re a monster—you torch innocent families! You can’t seriously expect me to believe that you’ll let us go!”

Bubble spell, bubble spell… where _was_ it?!

The dragon yawned, displaying rows of razor-sharp teeth. “You’re getting more and more annoying as we speak. Keep this up and I might just eat you now and use the wizard as a toothpick. He’s scrawny enough.”

“Hey!” Douxie wheezed.

Archie shifted to his dragon form, flying up near the dragon’s face. “Now, ma’am, I’m sure we can come to a reasonable agreement, dragon to dragon. Just let the wizard go, please.”

“What’s it to you, pipsqueak?”

Archie shrugged in midair. “I’ve grown rather fond of him, somehow.”

“And what’s your grand negotiation for the knight, hm?”

“Oh, him? You two can battle to your heart’s content. Go ahead and eat him.”

“Traitor,” Gareth grumbled, “Dragon, release the wizard!”

Bubble spell!

The dragon yawned again. “No, I don’t think so. You’re nowhere near as polite as the pipsqueak dragon.”

“Well,” Douxie interrupted, “It’s been great, being a hostage and all. Fantastic. Really. But all of this debating over my life is starting to get _very_ old _very_ fast, so if you’ll excuse me—” he cast the shield, pushing the dragon’s claw off. He rolled to the side, the bubble rolling with him. “Haha!”

The dragon glared at him, raising her tail. Douxie’s eyes widened.

“Oh, fuzzbuckets.”

The tail slammed into his bubble shield, sending it flying. It crashed into a tree, and the strain burst it. Douxie tumbled towards the ground. “AHHHHH!”

Archie swooped over him, grabbing the back of his tunic in his jaws and flapping frantically. Douxie’s fall slowed, but he still landed _hard_.

“Ow,” he groaned, staring at the sky, “Everything hurts.”

“Douxie…”

“No, nope. I’m just going to lie here until everything stops spinning.”

“I’m sure the dragon will appreciate you not running for your life. Because she’s about to make good on her threat to eat Gareth.”

Douxie rolled over with a groan. Sure enough, Gareth was hanging onto the jaws of the dragon for dear life, holding her snout shut while she thrashed her head around, trying to dislodge him. “Well, that’s fantastic.”

“I’ve got her!” Gareth crowed, “Douxie, use a spell to kill her! She’s almost finished! We’ve got this one in the bag!”

Archie pushed his glasses up his snout. “He’s not the brightest, is he?”

“We have very differing opinion on what ‘almost finished’ is,” Douxie agreed, picking himself up, “Right, he’s about to become a knight kebob.” Douxie cast a lasso spell, wrapping the loop around the dragon’s mouth. “I’ve got her! You can let go!”

Gareth dropped to the ground, rolling and grabbing his sword. “Excellent!”

The dragon turned and looked directly at Douxie, her eyes smoldering with fire. She shook her head, and Douxie’s arms were nearly yanked out of their sockets as he clutched to the magical lasso. She whipped her head back and forth, and he was pulled off of his feet, flying through the air.

“I’m going to be sick,” he groaned, wrapping his arms and legs around the lasso, “Gareth, _get her_!”

“Aha! Right!”

The knight ran forward, bringing his sword in a thrust towards the dragon’s heart. She shook her head one more time, finally dislodging Douxie, who went flying through the air—again—and slammed into another tree. He landed in a heap on the ground, watching dazed as she snapped at Gareth, forcing him to retreat. She swiped at him with one massive paw, catching him on the head and throwing him sideways. He didn’t get up.

“No!” Douxie struggled to his feet, scrolling through his spells.

The dragon prowled towards him. “No more tricks, little wizard?”

“Ah!” Douxie focused his attention on Gareth’s sword, which floated up and towards them. “Actually, you’ll find I’ve still got one trick left.” The dragon growled, turning to face the floating weapon.

“Oh, no,” Archie whispered, “The broom spell—you _didn’t_!”

Douxie grinned with a wince. “I did.”

“Are you trying to get yourself _killed_?!

“Trust me. I know what I’m doing.”

“Oh, dear.”

The sword flew right at Douxie, slashing at him. He ducked, dodging and weaving away from the weapon.

“Wow,” the dragon said flatly, “Color me impressed. I get dinner _and_ a show. You’re not a very good wizard, are you?”

The sword hovered right in front of Douxie. He moved slightly to the right, and it followed his movement. To the left—the same. It had him pinned—he couldn’t move backwards because that was where the dragon was. Forwards, the sword.

The sword stabbed right for him, and Douxie hit the dirt. The sword flew right over him, and the dragon roared in agony. Douxie rolled over and hauled himself up, dodging a stray wingstrike as the dragon thrashed. The sword had struck her right in the eye, and was lodged deep. Douxie’s hand drifted to his chest, making a face. That had almost been him. The dragon finally fell, her breathing fading away.

Douxie pumped one fist in the air. “Ha! We did it!” He dusted off his sleeves with a wince. “Still think I can’t handle real magic, Merlin? I just killed a dragon! Gareth—oh, no!”

Douxie limped his way over to the fallen knight. The dragon’s claw had torn across his face, leaving a deep gash. “Oh, no. No, no, no, I can fix this, Gareth, just hold on, I’ve got you!”

Gareth blinked at him. “H-hey. You did it.”

“Hang in there, you’re going to be fine!” Douxie promised, ripping off one of his shirtsleeves and pressing it to the cut, trying to stem the blood flow. “I’ve got you, Gareth, don’t you die on me!”

“’s just a little cut,” Gareth mumbled, “’ll be fiiiiiiine.”

“Hold that cloth there,” Douxie ordered, hauling the knight up to his feet. He was _heavy_ —and all of that armor wasn’t helping. Douxie dragged Gareth back to the horses. “Can you ride?”

“Suuuuure. I’m a _great_ rider. I can ride _circles_ around you.”

“Yeah, I know, you did it. C’mon, up you get.” Douxie struggled to boost the knight up onto his horse, Archie tugging on the knight from above to help.

“Douxie, you’re a _great_ friend, did you know that?” Gareth slurred, leaning against his horse’s neck.

Douxie stared in horror at him. “Oh, fuzzbuckets, he’s lost too much blood. He’s going to die, isn’t he?! He’s already delirious!”

“No, no, no,” Gareth shushed him loopily, “You’re, like…” he seemed to search for the right word. “… _amazing_! None of the other knights wanted to come, but you came after me to help, even though you don’t know any killing spells. You’re _awesome_. You’re my _best friend_.”

Douxie chuckled nervously. “Haha, okay, buddy, let’s get you back to Camelot.”

“Mmmmmmm, I need my sword.”

“I’ll get it,” Archie volunteered, “You’re not in great shape either, Douxie. You need to get back home.”

“Just bruised, Arch. I’ll be fine. Better than this guy.” He jabbed a thumb at Gareth, who was serenading his horse, singing about its glossy fur.

“Go on, Douxie. You need to find him a healer.”

Douxie nodded, mounting his own horse and grabbing Gareth’s reins. He took it slow—Gareth needed help, but riding too fast would just make it worse.

Through some miracle, nothing attacked them on the way, and Douxie managed to get them to the gates. “Hi again.”

The guards gaped at him. “What happened to you?!”

Douxie slid off of his horse. “You know. Went dragon slaying. Saved the kingdom. The usual.” His foot got caught in the stirrup, and he hopped up and down on one foot, struggling to untangle it. _Ow_ , everything was sore.

“We killed a _dragon_!” Gareth crowed, falling off of his horse. The guards lunged forward and caught him.

“Whoa, there!” One of them carried Gareth off, and the other turned to Douxie.

“You should see the doctor, too.”

“Me? Why? I’m in _peak_ condition. Never been better. And besides, I need to get to the wild woods. Merlin gave me this whole task, and the dragon slaying was a bit of a distraction, so I need to get back on—”

The guard picked him up, throwing him over one shoulder. “Hey!”

“If I were you, I’d _avoid_ Merlin for a bit. He’s in a cranky mood.”

Douxie wriggled in the guard’s grip. Really, this was stupid. “Oh, that’s not odd, that’s what he’s like _all_ the time.”

“You’re seeing the healer.”

Douxie went limp. Struggling wasn’t going to get him anywhere. “Fine. But he better not put any of those leeches near me!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone wondering, Lyonesse's name is pronounced like "lioness"


	3. The Lectures Never Stop

“Is he going to be okay?”

“Stop hovering over me,” the healer snapped, pushing Douxie back, “He’ll be _fine_ , so long as _someone_ doesn’t _jostle my hand_ while I’m giving him _stitches_!”

Douxie backed off. “Right, right.”

Gareth managed a half-grin. “Yeah, Douxie. Give me space.”

“And _you_ keep your blabbing mouth shut for _five seconds_ for the same reason,” the healer growled, “You’re not any better than he is!”

The door slammed open, and a girl came rushing in, long flowy sleeves and wavy brown hair flying behind her. “Gareth!”

His face lit up. “Lyonesse!”

The healer sighed, setting down his needle and thread. “Out!” he ordered, shooing Lyonesse and Douxie away. “Go wait outside!” He pushed them out the door and slammed it shut.

“Aw, c’mon, I’m injured, too.”

Lyonesse turned big, worried brown eyes on him. “You are? Is it bad? Do you need a healer right now?!”

“No, I—just bruises. I was just…”

Lyonesse started pacing back and forth. “He’s a great big _idiot_!” she shouted at the door, “You hear me, Gareth? You’re a _moron_! What were you _thinking_ , going after a _dragon_?!” She turned back to Douxie. “You were with him? Just between you and me, how dumb was he? Did he challenge it to a wrestling match?”

“What? No, no. He used his sword.”

Lyonesse sighed, running a hand through her hair. “Thank you. For looking after him. He sent a letter, telling me that he was going to kill a dragon. I got here as fast as I could, and then the other knights told me that they didn’t even go with him-!” She gave him a tiny curtsy. “I’m the Lady Lyonesse, by the way.”

Douxie inclined his head. “Douxie.”

“That’s an… interesting name. You’re not a knight, are you?”

“Me? Oh, no. No, thank you.”

“But you still went after a dragon? That was brave.”

“Or incredibly stupid,” Merlin’s voice growled. Douxie jumped, whirling around to face him.

“Master Merlin! I—”

“What were you _thinking_?! Not all dragons are like Archie! They’re _incredibly_ dangerous creatures if they’re hostile, which this one evidently _was_!”

“I know that, but—”

“Then why would you run after one like that?! Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed?!”

Lyonesse stepped forward. “He only acted to save my betrothed, Sir Gareth! His intentions—”

“I don’t care about his _intentions_ , the fact was that it was _incredibly_ stupid…” Merlin glanced at her. “Who are you? Never mind, it’s not important. Come along, Douxie, you’re coming back to the tower with me.”

Douxie gestured back to the healer’s home. “But what about—”

“Leave him, he’s just another knight. Bone-headed creatures, all of them.” Merlin gave him a critical glance. “You’d fit right in with them.”

“Oh, come on, it wasn’t _that_ bad-!”

“Hisirdoux, I’m done arguing, you will come back _this instant_!” Merlin turned on his heel, striding back towards the palace.

Douxie waved awkwardly to Lyonesse. “Bye.”

“Good luck,” she murmured.

“Douxie!” Merlin yelled.

“Coming!” Douxie jogged to keep up with Merlin. “We did kill it, you know. We didn’t fail.”

“And? Would you like a medal or something? You’re a _wizard_ , Douxie, you don’t have time for unimportant side quests like aiding knights on their foolish quests!”

“Oh, yeah? Remind me how you met Arthur again?”

“He was a future king, it hardly counts. I’m trying to ensure the safety of the kingdom, Douxie, and you’re off…” Merlin waved a hand. “…Gallivanting with knights!”

“You’ve got Morgana to help you with all of the magic,” Douxie grumbled, “What do you need _me_ for? You never teach me any real magic!”

“When the time comes, Hisirdoux.”

Douxie threw his hands in the air. “And _when_ is that time going to come?! Morgana’s already got _her_ staff!”

“Don’t compare yourself to Morgana, Douxie, it’s like comparing apples and mutton, there’s nothing to say about it. She’s a shadowmancer, something that neither of us have the talent for.”

“You know what I had to fight that dragon? A shield spell, a lasso, and a spell that makes the broom attack me!”

“Well, I seem to recall that I’m generally against you _fighting dragons_ , so I shouldn’t think you’d need any other spells.”

“Gareth would have _died_!”

“Knights are a halfpenny a dozen. Wizards are a little harder to come by. The knights are just muscle. Lackeys of the king.”

“And you’re much better?” Douxie grumbled.

Merlin seemed to swell up to twice his height, his eyes sparking with magic. “Don’t _ever_ call me someone’s lacky again,” he thundered.

Douxie shrank back. “Sorry,” he murmured, “I just…”

Merlin pinched the bridge of his nose. “Don’t act like such a martyr. You… did a passable job.”

Douxie perked up. Coming from Merlin, that was basically saying ‘I’m proud of you.’ “Really?”

“Yes. Just _don’t_ —” Merlin stabbed one finger at Douxie. “—ever do it again.” Merlin looked him up and down. “You’re not injured, are you?”

Douxie shrugged with a wince. “Just bruises.”

“Hmph. Where’s your nanny cat?”

“Archie is my _friend_ , not my nanny.” Douxie scanned the sky. “I don’t know—he stayed behind to retrieve Gareth’s sword.”

“He’ll turn up.” Merlin opened the door to the tower. “You—go right up to your room. I don’t want any more incidents from you tonight.”

Douxie trudged up. His feet felt like they were made of lead, and he flopped right on his bed when he got upstairs. He was just starting to drift off when Archie flapped in through the window, gingerly depositing Gareth’s sword on the floor and shifting back into a cat. “You look like a wreck.”

“Hrngle,” Douxie agreed, facedown on his pillow, “Where have _you_ been?”

“Taking care of some things,” Archie said vaguely, “How was Merlin?”

Douxie turned his face towards his cat. “About what I expected.” He turned over, lying on his back. “We did the right thing, right Arch? Killing the dragon? I mean, I know the knights will kill anything magical that they can get their hands on, so did the dragon even deserve it?”

Archie leapt up onto the bed, curling up next to him. “You saw the forests. This wasn’t just some dragon who ate knights that attacked her. She was on a rampage, burning down everything in sight. She needed to be stopped.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as Douxie. “Are you alright?”

“I’ll be feeling it tomorrow, but I’ll live. You?”

“Goodness, Douxie, I’m not the one who got whipped around by a fully-grown dragon.”

A knock on the window sounded, and Douxie glanced to the side. Gareth was outside the window, bandages wrapped around his face. “Hey!”

Douxie rolled off of his bed, striding towards the window. “What are you _doing_?! Shouldn’t you be lying in bed somewhere?”

“Yeah, I escaped through the window. I heard Merlin outside, and it sounded like you were in pretty big trouble. He’s not keeping you locked up, is he?”

“What? No, no. I just have to stay up here tonight.”

Gareth stared at him in amazement. “And you’re actually going to _do_ it? I’ve always thought that a big bad magic-user would be a little more… rebellious, I suppose, not following the king’s orders.”

Douxie leaned against the window frame. Like having magical talent was something he’d _chosen_. “Believe it or not, I’ve had enough adventure for today.”

“Ah, all you did was kill a dragon, come on, you can shoot higher than that!”

“How’s Lady Lyonesse?”

Gareth laughed. “Really glad I’m not dead.”

“Just barely.”

Gareth gestured to his face. “What, you mean this? Tis but a scratch! Will be nothing but a battle scar in a few weeks!”

“Uh-huh.”

“Oh, and the healer said something about a concussion? But I’m sure that’s nothing. As you can see, I’m the _picture_ of health.”

Archie hopped up onto the windowsill. “You should go back to the healer’s. You’re not in any shape to be climbing the sides of buildings.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Gareth’s attention caught on something behind Douxie. “Is that my sword?”

Douxie picked it up, holding it hilt-first out the window. “Your mighty weapon, my lord.”

Gareth grabbed it. “Why thank you, my faithful squire.” He grinned wildly. “Are you sure you don’t want any more adventures?”

“Not tonight.”

“Fine, fine, I’ll go back to the grouchy healer. Oh, hey, Douxie? I meant what I said. About how you’re a good friend. I know you thought I was just saying it because I was losing blood, but I meant it.”

“You just said you had a concussion, I don’t trust your judgement right now. Besides, we barely know each other.”

Gareth grinned. “We shared a near-death adventure together. What more do you need?” he dropped out of sight, and Douxie closed the window.

Archie stretched. “You make some interesting friends, Douxie.”

Douxie collapsed on his bed. “That’s for sure. Where does he find that much _energy_?! He just fought a DRAGON!”

Archie leapt up next to him. “You know who you sound like? Merlin.”

Douxie blew out his candle, eyes already drifting shut. “Well, that’s enough disturbing thoughts for the night, Archie, thank you very much.”

“You’re quite welcome.” Archie curled up next to him, a small warm bundle against his side. “Good night, Douxie.”

Douxie’s only reply was a snore.


End file.
